They say love is universal, and trust me, I’m fluent in it!
I’m a 38-year-old woman living in one of the most multicultural metropolises in the world, and there’s a reason I chose this place as my home. I thrive in this vibrant, transnational space where cultures, languages, and traditions come together, each maintaining their essence while creating something new and extraordinary. It’s a universe where everyone should feel welcome, free of stereotypes and judgment, and it’s exactly where I feel most alive.
This openness and love for diversity shape every part of my life, including my relationships. I don’t see people or men, for that matter, through the narrow lens of where they come from. Western, Middle Eastern, European, Asian, American, Oriental, Latino, none of these labels define a person to me. People are people, each one a unique individual, and the only thing worth judging is their character and personality, not the passport they carry, the color of their skin, or the shape of their eyes.
And this is why I embrace relationships wholeheartedly. I love men, dating them, learning from them, sharing intimacy with them, and yes, making love to them. It’s one of life’s great pleasures, and I refuse to let outdated ideas or arbitrary boundaries dictate how I live and love.
Yet, for all my openness, I’m often confronted with remarks that make me pause—remarks that reveal how off others’ perspectives can be. Like when someone puts on a bad Indian accent or drops a tired stereotype about the person I’m dating. They think they’re just “keeping the conversation light,” but honestly, it’s like watching someone trip over their own assumptions while thinking they’re being charming. It’s not that simple, it never is.
These moments aren’t just about me, they expose something deeper. Even people who value diversity can unconsciously fall back on stereotypes. It’s not that they don’t appreciate different cultures, they often do, but their comments reveal how deeply ingrained ideas about “default” preferences still are.
Take Arabic or Middle Eastern dates, for example. There’s often this underlying assumption that choosing someone from these backgrounds is somehow unusual. Meanwhile, dating a white Western man, the so-called “default” barely registers as a talking point. It’s seen as normal, unremarkable, the baseline against which everything else is judged.
What’s most surprising is that these remarks often come from people who see themselves as open-minded, who genuinely believe they’re just making casual observations. They don’t realize that comments like, “Oh, you have an Oriental taste,” or, “You found a South boy again,” reinforce stereotypes and sideline the individuality of the person I’m talking about.
This isn’t about a lack of appreciation for diversity, it’s about an inability to see how these unconscious biases slip into everyday conversations. If we’re going to talk about valuing diversity, it has to go beyond the surface. It means questioning why certain choices feel like the “default” while others are seen as deviations, and learning to approach every person as an individual, not a category.
So call it what you want—“global dating,” “tasting the world,” or just “living my best life.” Either way, I’ll keep swiping right on individuality.
They say love is universal, and trust me, I’m fluent in it!
Great text. Love the deep interest in the world & your romantic curiosity. We’re often stuck with stereotypes; thanks for the reminder, indeed.
Much love. 🤍
Well said, Ipek💙! Your perspective on individuality is sooo much needed!
Love as well as friendships or human connections doesn’t need any passport indeed.
And those tired remarks! Let's send them into retirement.